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Finally, I turned around and headed out the front door into the cool of the night. I headed down the road toward the town. I have learned that I seem to make the best decisions when I have the chance to walk alone and think.Thoughts raced through my mind. I kept going over different scenarios that could result from my actions tonight. The thought of that handsome young man waiting for me was intensely powerful. I could almost feel, smell, and visualize the kind of sex that we could have together.Several times I turned around and headed back toward the hotel, intent on seeing this sexual escapade through to a conclusion. Each time, the image of Chad's eyes would flash before me and I would turn around and keep walking. The night air was wonderfully refreshing. The sounds of the wildlife and the cool breeze were intoxicating to me. It was a beautiful night to walk and think.I thought of the wonderful years that we had enjoyed early on. We were so much in love. At times, we were so. The thought of having sex with a total stranger and with no strings attached, I found was actually arousing me. Was I losing my mind? Was this some subconscious desire or fantasy? After another drink I couldn't resist any longer, and whispered in his ear, “I might not be a prostitute, but if you wanted to pay me that amount of money I would satisfy you in any way you wanted tonight.” Leo smiled at me telling me he would love to spend the evening with me.With that, being the perfect gentleman, Leo took my hand, guiding me to the restaurant in the hotel, with his gentle hand on the small of my back. I could tell already that I loved his little acts of concern and affection. I don't know, but I just seemed to have this feeling of safety and protection with this man. He excused himself to use the restroom, affording me the chance to text my girlfriends to let them know that I was detained and would not be able to make dinner, but maybe I will meet them later at the club. Leo and I really.
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